Thursday, August 28, 2008

Day four. Almost to the weekend...

I can't believe I've almost made it past the dreaded first week. It feels like forever. Yesterday went so smoothly, then today was a zoo. It really was a good learning experience as to how important it is to plan ahead; I had to go to training yesterday, and I arrived super early today, but it still wasn't enough. I think I need to keep in mind that everything is going wonderfully and I don't need to freak out as much. I'm at least able to pretend like I know what I'm doing (and like I know what's going on) enough to get me through the day. I'm going to have to start disciplining, but it's so hard! Where do I start? How do I get the squirrely ones to be engaged so that I don't have to be on them every day, every five minutes? It's not their faults they can't sit still after lunch. I'm the same way... so why is it fair that I expect them to sit still and quietly for a whole hour? Is it because I'm the teacher, the adult, and they're the kid? We should be outside reading and writing and dreaming. I guess we'll wait till winter, when it's not so stinkin hot. Anyways, I gotta go to bed. It's late... I have a busy wedding weekend ahead of me, and I gotta make it through the half-day tomorrow. Peace out. 

Wednesday, August 27, 2008

Hump-day already?

I am kind of disappointed I didn't make the time to reflect on my very first day ever of teaching!! These past three days have been an absolutely ridiculous whirlwind. Every part of my body is aching in protest, and tons of stress are sitting in giant knots in my shoulders. My kids are squirrely and I already adore them to pieces. It's going to be a great year. 

Monday I arrived at school an hour and a half early to practice breathing. The parents all started arriving with their students to help them with their schedules. A couple were crying, one threw up from nervousness, and they all pretty much had a terrified look on their faces. It was cute. Homeroom was 2 hours long, and consisted of teaching them how to use a lock for 45 minutes, assigning lockers in random places, giving them time to open their pencil packs and write their names on their stuff, and to encourage them to make it through the day. The rest of our classes were 15 minutes long, but taking into account that they walked into the room, sat down, and realized they were in the wrong place, we didn't get much done. Somehow I survived, and I've been blessed to have a sub in my room which really worked to my advantage (she can get the little stuff done!) I came home Monday in a daze, not quite sure what went on, but already thinking nonstop about how precious my kids are. 

Two days later, I feel like I've been there for weeks. And not necessarily in a good way, just my physical exhaustion. We're all tired... we have no planning, and it's been hectic as the administration attempts to figure out scheduling. Yesterday we went over more expectations for my classroom procedures, except I'm kind of lying because I really don't know exactly how I want them to do things. Where are they going to turn in their papers? How do I want them to ask to go to the bathroom? What if they have to sharpen their pencils? What the heck am I going to do for homework? These are all questions that I'm bs-ing the answers to, because I really haven't decided how I want them to do things. I guess we'll just go with the flow.

Sixth graders are adorable. They don't know what's going on, they can't make decisions for themselves, yet they're starting to gain some independence and grow up a little. I see this through their "I Am" poems, which are pretty incredible. I'm really proud of them for getting into them and answering from their hearts. Some of them are kind of heart breaking, but it makes me remember how important teaching is and how it can really affect students' lives. Maybe I'm a dreamer, but I hope these kids will at least remember that I truly cared for them. Even the annoying ones. They make me think of myself as a middle schooler, dubbed the 'social butterfly.'

Today we wrote the poems, and I took their pictures. I'm going to post them up somewhere random around the room. Not sure where, or what its purpose is, but I guess it'll make them feel special. Maybe. I'm not sure they'll all want me to put their poems on the wall, but I want to start portfolios because I think they're great. Then we'll keep all the good stuff together, and I'll do something with it at the end of the year. 

Oh and I'm finally hired by the county! Hurray. Now I can actually get paid, get my school laptop, email address, and website. That is exciting stuff. Back to grading papers; the Chinese takeout guy (aka michael) is almost home with the 'dinner' i prepared. Way too lazy tonight. 

Sunday, August 24, 2008

Um... it's tomorrow?

I start teaching tomorrow. I'm not sure how I feel about that, but I guess I am as ready as I could be. I still have some work to do tonight, like figuring out exactly how the day will go. It's going to be pretty hectic due to the lack of orientation (dang tropical storm.) I can't wait to meet my little babies as they walk in my door all scared and crying because they have to leave their parents... it'll be a fun day :) I've been super calm leading up to tomorrow, not sure why, because I guess I should be freaking out, but I know that this is where the Lord wants me to be. I guess I'm experiencing the true meaning of "not worrying about tomorrow" because it will certainly worry about itself. I know that I'm going to be overwhelmed and flying through the day without really knowing what's going on, so I guess I'm not nervous now because I know I'll be fine. I just hope that I can live up to the expectations that have been set for me... that I'll be an effective teacher, that they'll like me, that I'll be able to teach them as well as the incredible teachers on my team. I want them to love english like I do... even the grammar stuff (which I need to work on!) It'll be a great, tough, wonderful, crazy first year!

Thursday, August 21, 2008

The first day is coming...

I'd like to attempt to write about my first year as a teacher. I think it will help me to focus and think about what goes on in my classroom, and most importantly how I can improve on a consistent basis. First of all, let me share about my experience of getting the job in the first place.

I've been relocated to Jacksonville for a couple weeks now, and after many attempts of finding a job, I was unsuccessful. I finally got an interview and an offer, but it was with a scripted FCAT remedial program that I wasn't too keen on teaching. So, after an anxious day of wrestling with myself and some wonderful conversations with other teachers, I decided to decline the position and give it up to the Lord. It was a tough call because of the stress of finding a job in Florida this year, but I felt that God had something out there for me. 

A couple days later, a position opened up at a middle school in St. Augustine. I immediately emailed the principal my credentials and resume; to my surprise, I received a phone call later that night as I was on my way to meet some friends for dinner. We talked for about 15 minutes as she told me about her school and the wonderful teachers she had. I found myself extremely excited during the conversation... she scheduled an interview for me the following Monday. There was something about her that stuck out to me. That weekend, I prayed a ton and had everyone I knew praying for me. I only felt peace as I prepared for the interview.

The morning of, my husband prayed for me before he left for work. That meant so much to me... it started my day off perfectly. I was not nervous in the slightest bit as I entered the school. I had a wonderful conversation with the principal as we talked about our favorite middle school books and my future career as a middle school teacher. I passed the first 'phase' and then met 6 language arts teachers that had moved with the principal from another school. Again, I was not nervous as we sat and talked as if we knew each other. I brought my portfolio and answered any questions they had about my philosophy of teaching/reading. It was so natural- it was crazy how at ease I felt. 

I left so they could talk about me, and met two girls slightly older than me who were so nice. I knew they had to be Christians (and I was right!) The principal walked out and led me to her office where she told me that she wanted me at her school, and not to accept any other position. She was genuinely excited about me being there, and that was a crazy feeling.

So here I am. I've been planning all week, and I have the most wonderful teachers as guides. I couldn't ask for more amazing people to mentor me through my first year. The other language arts teacher is incredible, and I am so excited about working with her. My school is beautiful... practically brand new, extremely supportive parents, all the technology I could imagine. I am blessed beyond belief to be the 'chosen one' out of 797 applicants. I know that the Lord has a plan for me at Pacetti Bay; I am not sure why He chose me for the position, but I am beyond excited to be there. 

As I am sitting outside on my patio, watching the trees blow through tropical storm Fay, I am at peace with the upcoming first day of school. I'm not quite ready, and I know I'll be terrified the day of, but I know the Lord has me in his hands and will guide me each step of the way. It is imperative that I make the time to ask Him to direct me, because this is His will, His school, and His plan. Did I mention that the majority of the teachers there are Christians? Hot dang! I can't wait to meet each one of my sixth grade babies and hope that I will be conformed to Christ's image each and every day as I love on my kids.